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co prawda stare ale ...
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[img]https://scontent-frt3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/p552x414/272132339_458831935797073_8152195813113554672_n.jpg?_nc_cat=104&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=825194&_nc_ohc=yys8lYdoyPwAX8GzcHB&_nc_oc=AQkkHsdiEAAGuGQHw5_Q647_U6DmyAon6iNeBwdymCYYGm8zGU0EXYJZNr1gOHhdSWc&_nc_ht=scontent-frt3-1.xx&oh=00_AT8_dA9HLdPGGqCfwabStjWEC3dkezx5EmgafK-HmCALSg&oe=61EEEE72[/img]
[img]https://scontent-frt3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/p526x296/272038296_145386777858579_7383597035937118058_n.jpg?_nc_cat=102&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=825194&_nc_ohc=NB1B7MEyauYAX-ur0N7&tn=-kbCubcSHCfH7hyo&_nc_ht=scontent-frt3-1.xx&oh=00_AT-HmVN4BtKWLBlsgLHYq9z7M3pUw97Kz9FsS8hLHp4EfQ&oe=61EED98C[/img]
[img]https://scontent-frx5-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/269686969_7245894112119275_5746871788171302254_n.jpg?_nc_cat=105&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=825194&_nc_ohc=IHYOwWvZcaYAX-0jeOZ&_nc_ht=scontent-frx5-1.xx&oh=00_AT9ycYR0TY1-HhAsYFk9HGSC8gmHokugK9hpH-EJFulHow&oe=61EF4E6E[/img]
[img]https://scontent-frx5-2.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/p526x296/272199040_145303671200223_7278202466638592399_n.jpg?_nc_cat=111&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=825194&_nc_ohc=6XLqeFWyti8AX_VJldc&_nc_ht=scontent-frx5-2.xx&oh=00_AT9PgywEjurIP7X6X6703V7o4z_Bznz8OsY4Cy5FjdnI7g&oe=61EF48EF[/img]
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Malarz do kolegi:
To jest mój najnowszy realistyczny obraz
,,Pracujący tynkarze''
Jak to pracujący, przecież oni siedzą i palą papierosy!
Przecież powiedziałem: obraz realistyczny.
[img]https://scontent-frt3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/p526x296/272289313_441504910969170_6287499913677017981_n.jpg?_nc_cat=108&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=825194&_nc_ohc=Aw-CkRsqN-wAX8G-1Bs&_nc_ht=scontent-frt3-1.xx&oh=00_AT8fOVH7N2lK3q6wcOTjrpEEVzWiGBOh9aQh5lA5QEGn7w&oe=61F1A276[/img]
[img]https://scontent-frt3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/269603208_444257553910355_1048534153750218622_n.jpg?_nc_cat=106&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=825194&_nc_ohc=_iAC4JYB4_0AX8Kqt3l&_nc_ht=scontent-frt3-1.xx&oh=00_AT8-L45yBVhHuO5PoERVJND2KhVug9pNxEsNKF1jZ135bQ&oe=61F1943C[/img]
[img]https://scontent-frt3-2.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/272247635_127568833091343_963279236100455155_n.jpg?_nc_cat=101&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=825194&_nc_ohc=3tNGUANd4OAAX-c19ZT&_nc_ht=scontent-frt3-2.xx&oh=00_AT-pUT3JC-lBOVz6Xbqb8FjiAP6jeH5TiuWy6GvsHf3nUA&oe=61F0C318[/img]
[img]https://scontent-frx5-2.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/272297269_127532046428355_7566461650728088713_n.jpg?_nc_cat=111&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=825194&_nc_ohc=mam8PQy4XfwAX_LF7yr&_nc_ht=scontent-frx5-2.xx&oh=00_AT9e1YIk4W3G_HcTMs0_MkvuFX9yHppOS09RB3_xwTBh_g&oe=61F1ACFC[/img]
[img]https://scontent-frt3-2.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/p526x296/272270345_4814405728619462_204754045890564148_n.jpg?_nc_cat=103&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=825194&_nc_ohc=Ov9K2akSzwEAX-x-11C&_nc_ht=scontent-frt3-2.xx&oh=00_AT-LJD0OpHyUQdAOsdJ7LyU6kv9kJB4ijo4Fu2BLTV5Zuw&oe=61F07F7E[/img]
[img]https://scontent-frt3-2.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/p526x296/269675484_2078634975616978_3238620463684297556_n.jpg?_nc_cat=103&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=825194&_nc_ohc=m6R9sFgalSUAX9owITj&_nc_ht=scontent-frt3-2.xx&oh=00_AT-ErUG-acg9knauszBwHOSnakB1RcC26yBGWN5nlpCngQ&oe=61F08611[/img]
Kiedy słownik wie lepiej…
Zabawne przejęzyczenia powstałe w wyniku użycia autokorekty.
Niejednemu z nas włos zjeżył się na głowie, kiedy okazało się, że wysłaliśmy wiadomość tekstową z psikusem zrobionym przez autokorektę. Jak wybrnąć z sytuacji, kiedy okazało się, że odbiorca za chwilę odczyta życzenia o treści: „Spokojnych świąt spędzonych w rodzinnym grobie”? Receptą jest na to chyba tylko śmiech, dlatego wspólnie pośmiejmy się z takich wpadek.
[img]https://cracovia.krakow.pl/uploads/media/2022-01/image-png-98899843.png[/img]
Sprawdźcie, jakie zabawne przejęzyczenia powstałe w wyniku użycia autokorekty popełnili nasi czytelnicy. ?
Przywitanie SMS-em: „Dzień dobry, Panie Leszczu” zamiast „Dzień dobry, Panie Leszku”.
SMS od chłopaka do dziewczyny, posiadaczki i miłośniczki kotów: „Koty zmarły”. Panika. 3 minuty później kolejny SMS ze sprostowaniem: „żarły”.
SMS-owe zapytanie o wyniki badań, czy są dobre. Odpowiedź: „Rak” zamiast „Tak”.
Historia czytelniczki: Przypomniała mi się jeszcze jedna historia, z czasów przedkomputerowych, ale jak najbardziej klawiaturowych. Moja śp. babcia w latach 50. pracowała w dużym zakładzie przemysłowym jako maszynistka, tj. przepisywała dokumenty na maszynie. Układ liter na tych maszynach jest taki sam jak na naszych klawiaturach QWERTY. Któregoś razu babcia otrzymała polecenie napisania delegacji dla grupy pracowników. Mieli jechać na kursy do Berlina. Tyle że babci palec się omsknął i wysłała ich na kur*wy do Berlina. W tym przypadku skończyło się na śmiechu. Mniej szczęścia miała babci koleżanka, która omyłkowo napisała tow. Sralin zamiast Stalin. Ta straciła pracę i miała sporo nieprzyjemności.
Z pracy magisterskiej: „Respondenci mogli zaznaczać więcej odpowiedzi” zamieniło się w „Respondenci mogli zaszczać więcej odpowiedzi”.
Mail do profesora z zagranicy: „Dead Professor”, zamiast „Dear Professor”.
SMS do rodziców po powrocie z pierwszych samodzielnych wakacji miał brzmieć: „Już po rejsie”. Wyszło: „Już po seksie”.
Pytanie o to, jak minął koledze wyjazd służbowy: „Dobrze. Wrócił, ale zmarł”. Miało być „zmarzł”.
Klasyk: Zamiast: „Łaski mi nie robisz” – „Laski mi nie robisz”.
Zasłyszane: „Oglądam sobie stan dupy”. Miało być „stand-upy”.
Jednej z naszych czytelniczek autokorekta zmieniła „espadryle” na „wieloszczety”. Zastanawiające…
„Muszę się wysrać” zamiast „muszę się wyspać”. Tak łatwo pomylić ze sobą te dwie potrzeby fizjologiczne!
SMS do klientki: „Pozdrawiam, Martyna M*** zabija”.
A miało być „Aviva”.
Wpadka dziennikarza: „Kierowca fiuta nie zapanował nad kierownicą”.
SMS do współpracownika: Zamiast: „Chodź na sec do mnie szybko” – „Chodź na sex do mnie szybko”.
SMS kolegi po meczu piłki nożnej: „Mam kontuzję nogi i nie mogę jaj nadwyrężać” (a miało być „jej”).
Z pracy magisterskiej: Zamiast: „Park służy rekreacji” było: „Park służy prokreacji”.
SMS od koleżanki: „Daj znać, o której będziesz, bo nie zrobię Ci orgazmu w minutę”. Chwilę później: „Ja Pier***! Miało być obiadu”.
Klasyk w SMS-ach: „Dziwki” zamiast „Dzięki”.
SMS: „Całuję kochankę” zamiast: „Całuję, kochanie”.
Informacja SMS-owa od gościa hotelowego: „Dzień dobry, zwalę zaraz po przyjeździe”. (Czytaj: „zapłacę zaraz po przyjeździe”).
Wiadomość od córki: „Byłam ostatnio z Łukaszem na saunach w aquaparku. Ogólnie było fajnie, tylko jak zanurkowałam w basenie zewnętrznym, to jakiś facet wsadził mi pałę prosto w oko!” Poprawka po chwili: „Boszszszsz, mamo! PALEC!”.
Historia czytelnika: Rozwiązanie (dla pewnej sytuacji) zaproponowane przeze mnie w SMS-ie zasugerowałem jako „najseksowniejsze” (miało być „najsensowniejsze”).
https://polszczyzna.pl/zabawne-przejezyczenia/
[img]https://scontent-frt3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/p526x296/272673110_4824986844228017_2569022698847964397_n.jpg?_nc_cat=107&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=825194&_nc_ohc=y1lGmOyPWQwAX89jiv-&_nc_ht=scontent-frt3-1.xx&oh=00_AT-wiUOLp8gmU3tVVsTCsLDDWbMVrlaZkdeeoAPY3Y10KQ&oe=61F35DAE[/img]
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Mówi penis do penisa .:
Słyszałeś ?Podobno z aptek wycofali viagrę!
No to leżymy...
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Nie chcesz psa, spraw sobie konia kanapowego...
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Bar zamykają ,więc niedopici kumple
idą do jednego z nich.
Drzwi otwierają im potulna teściowa i żona.
Kumpel pyta kolegi. Jak ty je tak wytresowałeś ?
Raz przyszedłem do domu pijany. One zaczęły strasznie
na mnie krzyczeć. Ja wtedy złapałem nożyczki i ostrzygłem Pudla.
Drugim razem było to samo.
Za trzecim razem zabiłem pudla
A co to ma wspólnego z żoną i teściową?
One są już po drugim strzyżeniu .
[img]https://scontent-frt3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/272835570_425529322650485_597909157377844890_n.jpg?_nc_cat=108&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=5cd70e&_nc_ohc=hWrdpJKayUIAX8Q16MC&_nc_ht=scontent-frt3-1.xx&oh=00_AT9_Eq01IcNdUbnxN7__rXE5Gpw-jyfnUmB1C98hmcVM6w&oe=61FBB0E8[/img]
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[img]https://scontent-frt3-2.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/p552x414/272763598_446892617097066_1069556563961164277_n.jpg?_nc_cat=103&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=5cd70e&_nc_ohc=lyuuLDcukoMAX91a6-H&_nc_ht=scontent-frt3-2.xx&oh=00_AT_o30rGmACQnnXoqdYJ0OwAIL07kv9qd4JL6MomSY8qpA&oe=61FD4602[/img]
- Edytowany
[quote]#post1520612
[img]https://scontent-frx5-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/272812572_3122418024700994_4872190758185267790_n.jpg?_nc_cat=100&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=5cd70e&_nc_ohc=VWT3j9X9CsMAX-m7mzn&_nc_ht=scontent-frx5-1.xx&oh=00_AT9tV5YuY8xl1VLKfR7m0ob2bbytzDU9qoC3CbX_Ce-uBA&oe=61FBBF50[/img]
[img]https://cracovia.krakow.pl/uploads/media/2022-01/image-png-01176664.png[/img]
[/quote]
Komu przy czytaniu tego kawału pomyślało się o @KruszynaKSC#7322
🤔
- Edytowany
[img]https://scontent-frt3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/p180x540/272890579_352099650251122_4622906255647417902_n.jpg?_nc_cat=107&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=8bfeb9&_nc_ohc=G-dqbC6CNmAAX9Wk8aU&_nc_ht=scontent-frt3-1.xx&oh=00_AT8H0Q__NgFdS37xJZwVshxMkkEtmy6dMAWtO3jc4J1nhQ&oe=61FDC548[/img]
[img]https://scontent-frt3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/s640x640/272868687_146266681121931_370221834286024131_n.jpg?_nc_cat=104&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=8bfeb9&_nc_ohc=bx9nmsR0XtoAX9K3IRn&_nc_ht=scontent-frt3-1.xx&oh=00_AT_y8s6UVXa0ZPDnEZaoojcZu0yKj_ENnqAePdYzalO7RA&oe=61FEE2E3[/img]
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